There are times
where putting others first is exactly what you should do and there are other times
where you need to put yourself first. That decision should be between you and
God. Whatever struggle you feel whether it's being taken for granted or
putting too much on your plate, pray about it. That’s the first thing you
should do, always seek God.
Lately, my best
friend and I have had many discussions on this. Like many others, we struggle
with putting ourselves first in some situations for the two reason: feeling we should always be of help and of being
looked at as selfish and at times, being blatantly told that. I’m quickly
realizing that when you feel obligated to put someone first, chances are they’re
putting you second. Whether it’s a job or a relationship, if it’s toxic enough
to make you feel guilty or unappreciated, firstly pray about it and second consider leaving. That’s my advice to
you. Have enough respect for yourself that you refuse to be walked on, treated
unfairly and taken for granted. For the sake of your own health and happiness. Don’t
get angry or try to seek revenge, be better than that. If you feel you should,
walk away with class and dignity, however that may be. And after you’ve done
that, pray for whomever or whatever it was that made you feel the way you did.
There’s a quote, “When
you say yes to others, make sure you are not saying no to yourself.” Don’t
spread yourself to thin, don’t bite off more than you can chew. As helpful as
we all want to be, if you feel like you’ve taken on more than you can handle,
it’s time to put yourself first. It’s time to lighten your load and become a
better you. Because at the end of the day, let’s face it. You aren’t helping
anyone else out if you aren’t putting your happiness and health first. You can’t
do your best if you aren’t at your best. If you feel there is areas in your
life where you are taken for granted, address it how you please but make sure
that in the end, you put God then yourself first. In the most troubling of
times, make sure you are seeking the Lord and in the happiest of times, thank
him.
Putting yourself
first doesn’t mean you’re putting others second. It simply means your health
and happiness are important and shouldn’t be taken advantage of. That doesn’t
mean we should only focus on the interests of our own and not others. Yes, we
should remove ourselves from toxic situations in our lives but we should seek
God during these times. Pray for others, those who you feel caused those situations
and those involved. In the hardest times whether it’s leaving a job or
friendship that caused you pain, you should be praying for them. Have the same
attitude Jesus would have. We aren’t perfect and we should never strive for
perfect but we should strive for Grace. Forgive and forget. Spread love and be
loved.
